Ok, my son's in the bathtub, so this is going to be quick:
I was just perusing my email inbox and found this article on a study in Adoptive Families Magazine. It's about how adoptees fare psychologically when compared to their non-adopted siblings.
Often, I find the articles in Adoptive Families frustrating, as they tend to wax Pollyanna about all things adoption. However, this study seems to have some solid research behind it, and frankly, it's a breath of fresh air after reading all those studies about how screwed up adoptees are. I'm tired of feeling screwed up.
What do you think about this study? How does it compare with your experience in the adoption constellation?
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Do You Love Mad Men? I Do!
Check out what ReadingWritingLiving is posting about how adoption is treated on the TV show, Mad Men.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
A New Low In Reality Television
(this is a still from the one I'm watching right now.)
...or is it a documentary? I'm referring to the new television series "Adoption Diaries," an episode of which I am watching right now. I'm a bit flabbergasted by the show's goal to condense the entire length of a pregnancy, an adoption application process, and the placement of a baby with an adoptive family into one half-hour segment. It's so short, in fact, they throw in another segment of another adoption process just to make the program last a whole hour.
So one adoption isn't worth even one hour on television? What is the takeaway message from this show, then? It's all neat and tidy and wrap-up-able in thirty minutes?
They do show some of the uncertainty and sadness that the birthmothers feel, but the show definitely seems slanted toward the experience of the adopting family.
The whole thing seems really gross and exploitive to me. UGH.
This just in: I just watched a commercial about the show that comes on AFTER "Adoption Diaries" . It's called "The Locator," and it's about--you guessed it--a guy who helps family members reunite after they've been separated for decades by adoption and other such situations.
Unbelievable. Really, now.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Basic Human Rights
What does original identity mean to you? Check out this Adoptee rights video on youtube; it's very moving. Footage from the July 2009 adoptee rights protest in Philadelphia.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Well, Here's One Way to Search I Never Thought About
A biological dad of a 19 year old girl, who was recently informed of his paternity, is searching for his lost daughter via...ebay! Check out his auction here.
What do you make of this approach??
What do you make of this approach??
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Social Networking, Adoption Style
Anyone out there checking out the adoption-themed social networking site, Adoption Voices? I recently joined, and would love to hear your opinions about it.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Taxonomy and Adoption

Disclosure: I am a secret science geek. Every week, I look forward to the arrival of Tuesday for the sole reason that that is the day of the week when the New York Times "Science Times" section is published. I read it from cover to cover, which sometimes takes all week, if I'm particularly busy, but I carry it around in my purse, reading bits of it every chance I get. Ok, that's enough disclosure about my dorky habits for now.
Here's an article from the Science Times on Tuesday, August 11, 2009 that struck me as particularly pertinent to both adoption and poetry (another of my passions). Entitled "Reviving the Lost Art of Naming the Living World," the article argues that taxonomy is a dying practice. I must admit, I can't understand how it could possibly be a dying practice, because from my biased perspective as an adoptee and a poet, naming the world is central to existence.
Yet the article's author, Carol Kaesuk Yoon says that "we are, all of us abandoning taxonomy, the ordering and naming of life. We are...losing the ability to order and name and therefore losing a connection to and a place in the living world." Do you feel this is true? Please let me know what you think about her assertion.
But here's my thesis: naming the world leads to knowing the world, and knowing the world helps us know ourselves and our place in it. This is especially important for adoptees, who don't know their place in the world because of their displacement from one family into another, often at a very early, preverbal age. Naming is also important for the poetically inclined, because in my opinion, poetry is the act of renaming the world, and in naming it, we both renew it, and we come to understand it better as a shared, universal experience.
Carol Kesuk Yoon also mentions some recent scientific studies that have led "some researchers to hypothesize that there might be a specific part of the brain that is devoted to the doing of taxonomy." If this hypothesis is true, it would suggest that taxonomic tendencies are evolutionarily based, integral to our humanness. Conversely, she says, people whose brains are damaged in this taxonomic area are "completely at sea. Without the power to order and name life, a person simply does not know how to live in the world, howo to understand it..They are utterly lost, anchorless in a strange and confusing world. Because to order and name life is to have a sense of the world around, and as a result, what one's place is in it."
Sound familiar, adopted people? I would posit that this "anchorlessness" due to the inability to name the world is similar to the unmoored feelings some adoptees (including myself) have when they do not know their origins. What do you think?
I also think that this cellular need to know my origins, to understand my place in the world is what drove me to become a poet. It was a stopgap way to name the world, to name my life, until I could find my birth family.
As David Kirk, a social scientist who did research about losses in adoption, concluded the way we heal is understanding those losses. I believe that in order to understand those losses, we must first name them: Kingdom, Phylum, Class, Order, Family, Genus, Species.
Do any of you readers out there have a similar (or opposite) opinion or experience to share?
Give us a shout!
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